Hello friends,
I'm very sad to say my beautiful and strong Aunt Susan has passed away after a long illness. She was 54 years old. She left this world early Sunday morning. She was a fighter in every sense of the word with more courage then I will ever now. She taught us all no matter your size, illness, or debilitating condition you can fright through and do anything. She was an inspiration to us all. We can take solace that the pain that has ravaged her body is now gone. She leaves behind her husband, Tom and son's Christopher and Ryan. She also leaves behind 2 brothers, 2 sisters, her mom and numerous nieces and nephews. We love her and will miss her.
I keep thinking the novel, The Lovely Bones, and the idea of heaven as they described it in the book. When Suzie goes to heaven in the book she finds it is her own personal heaven. I know my aunt would chose to have a heaven where she could move freely with no pain. She would be free of walkers and wheelchairs. I hope her beloved dog Tiramasu was up there waiting for her. Aunt Susan's heart was shattered when her little Yorkie and constant companion passed away this year. I hope there are now together taking long walks. I know that would be her personal heaven. She would be happy.
We are here left to grieve and it is very difficult. We will miss her terribly but are thankful she is free of pain. I do not grief like most believe. I become quiet mean and intentionally push people away. I do not want to be touched, hugged or comforted. I don't like crying in front of others and I get very uncomfortable when others do. I find myself apologizing every 2 minutes for the way I'm coping.
I have had some great posts scheduled this week. I don't know if I feel up to it right now. It kind of feels fake. I ask for your thoughts and prayers for my family who are traveling this week to NY for a ceremony on Friday.
Thank you.
Monday, January 30, 2012
Friday, January 27, 2012
Fill In The Blank...
Happy Friday cuties!
This week has been crazy to say the least.
I'm still in a bloggers rut. Not sure why but I'm just not. Now I understand why bloggers schedule posts! I took the day off. I'm attempting to get some crafting and wedding stuff done. Hoping that will help me get out of this rut and give me some stuff to blog about.
Linking up with Laura
1. My favorite place i've ever traveled to is Oxford England. I studied there while in college.
3. I pass the time on a plane (or bus, or car ride or train) by I hate flying! I usually try not to have a nervous breakdown. Lots of music and I keep my eyes closed. .
6. The craziest thing that ever happened to me while traveling is nothing really crazy has ever happened while I traveled. I'm happy to say all of our travels have been pretty fun and successful.
9. I have been to 12
2. Bora Bora is somewhere I'd love to go someday.
4. My three must-haves when I travel are magazine, music and a travel companion
5. My favorite travel companion is Brian.
7. The most exotic food I've ever tried while traveling is Hmm, can't say I tried anything exotic b/c I've never went anywhere exotic. I'm willing to try anything once we go on our honeymoon. First we should decide where we are going .
8. If I could live anywhere else, I'd live in I'm a NY girl but I absolutely LOVE Wilmington, NC.
states in the U.S.
Happy Weekend.
xoxo
K
Thursday, January 26, 2012
Its OK Thursday
I feel a bit like I've been in a daze because I can't believe its already Thursday.
I'm taking a day off tomorrow in hopes I can relax and take some time shopping with my grandma. We are pretty much the only 2 people who weren't able to visit my aunt in Georgia. She is having a really tough time so I hope a shopping day will get her mind off of how shitty things have been.
How about everyone else? Good week? Tell me because I could really use some happy news!
Linking up with Neely.
Its Ok
- To go out of my way to get Starbucks in the morning instead of the 3 Dunkin Donuts I pass on my route to work. Maybe if they didn't screw up my order all the time and their coffee is terrible.
- To not have any desire to blog when I'm feeling really sad.
- To not cope with death and dying like most people. I shut down. I don't want comfort and I don't know how to give it. Itsnot ok to have a breakdown on the treadmill at the gym. Makes it very uncomfortable for the old guy next to me with out an iPod.
- Its ok that my wedding invite are supposed to o out in 3 days and the envelops have not been delivered yet. Maybe that isn't ok???
- That we have only had one snow storm this winter and the day after the rain and 50 degrees washed it all away. Oh and its been 50 degrees for 3 days! Who needs winter anyways!?!
- To STILL not have our honeymoon planned.
- To work out on the treadmill at the gym for exactly 1 hour, from 8-9 yesterday just to watch One Tree Hill last night. Oh and by the way, WTF JULIAN!?!?!?!
- To have our house decorated for Valentine's Day for about 2 weeks. Not a huge lover of the holiday. I think I'm just trying to rush this winter.
AND....
Just because I'm having a super craptastic week I feel I need to add a few of these....
It's NOT OK...
-To link up and then not participate. It really pisses me off. Why am I wasting my time? I'm not even the one hosting link ups so I can only imagine what its like for the host!
- To just take the fan some one else is using at the gym and move it to your machine. How about asking if you could use it first?
- To not clean off your cardio equipment when at the gym. The gym provides us all with towles and spray. WTF, especially the bike! No one wants to sit on the bike you just left your ass sweat on. Disgusting. Its flu season, ya jerks!
- For people to tell you things like "This is the cycle of life" when you tell them a family member is dying. Seriously, NOT OK!
- To be sick for the entire month.
- To have had a migraine for 3 days. I had a few hours with out it yesterday and now its back full force!
I'm taking a day off tomorrow in hopes I can relax and take some time shopping with my grandma. We are pretty much the only 2 people who weren't able to visit my aunt in Georgia. She is having a really tough time so I hope a shopping day will get her mind off of how shitty things have been.
How about everyone else? Good week? Tell me because I could really use some happy news!
Linking up with Neely.
Its Ok
- To go out of my way to get Starbucks in the morning instead of the 3 Dunkin Donuts I pass on my route to work. Maybe if they didn't screw up my order all the time and their coffee is terrible.
- To not have any desire to blog when I'm feeling really sad.
- To not cope with death and dying like most people. I shut down. I don't want comfort and I don't know how to give it. Its
- Its ok that my wedding invite are supposed to o out in 3 days and the envelops have not been delivered yet. Maybe that isn't ok???
- That we have only had one snow storm this winter and the day after the rain and 50 degrees washed it all away. Oh and its been 50 degrees for 3 days! Who needs winter anyways!?!
- To STILL not have our honeymoon planned.
- To work out on the treadmill at the gym for exactly 1 hour, from 8-9 yesterday just to watch One Tree Hill last night. Oh and by the way, WTF JULIAN!?!?!?!
- To have our house decorated for Valentine's Day for about 2 weeks. Not a huge lover of the holiday. I think I'm just trying to rush this winter.
AND....
Just because I'm having a super craptastic week I feel I need to add a few of these....
It's NOT OK...
-To link up and then not participate. It really pisses me off. Why am I wasting my time? I'm not even the one hosting link ups so I can only imagine what its like for the host!
- To just take the fan some one else is using at the gym and move it to your machine. How about asking if you could use it first?
- To not clean off your cardio equipment when at the gym. The gym provides us all with towles and spray. WTF, especially the bike! No one wants to sit on the bike you just left your ass sweat on. Disgusting. Its flu season, ya jerks!
- For people to tell you things like "This is the cycle of life" when you tell them a family member is dying. Seriously, NOT OK!
- To be sick for the entire month.
- To have had a migraine for 3 days. I had a few hours with out it yesterday and now its back full force!
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Oh How Pinteresting...
Haven't really had the drive to blog recently with everything going on. I'm kinda feeling down and out and I don't really know how to blog about my feelings. I've been really upset since I couldn't afford a flight to Georgia. The flights were basically $800-$1000 one way. In addition to that I don't now if I could have been there and coped with it appropriately. I'm attempting to get back into the swing of things here today. Its easy to spend some mindless time on Pinterest. I'm not feeling very creative these days. Hope you can all understand.
Linking up with Michele
This is a status of Hachicko. His story warms my heart and breaks it all at the same time.
Hope you are all having a wonderful week.
Hopefully I'm back to my blogging self soon.
Linking up with Michele
This is a status of Hachicko. His story warms my heart and breaks it all at the same time.
Hopefully I'm back to my blogging self soon.
Monday, January 23, 2012
Thoughts and Prayers.
Our family is going through a very difficult time. My Aunt is dying. She has fought her entire life and she has decided she just can't do it anymore. We have been told her wishes and told to come see her as soon as possible to say goodbye.
My Aunt Susan was born in the mid 50's. She grew up in constant pain and in many hospitals. She wore braces on her legs as a child and was made fun of on a daily basis. My mom and their older brother would always beat people up for her. She was later diagnosed with Spina Bifida. As a teenager she spent an entire year in Blythdale Children's Hospital. As 16, my mother was married and she walked down the aisle with crutches and an entire body cast. She has always been tough as nails.
As an adult she graduated nursing school and became a neonatal nurse at one of NYC's worst hospitals. She nursed crack addicted babies back to health. She worked as a nurse for many years until her health again began failing. Her body wore out on her way to early. A several years ago she fell and suffered a broken leg at her home. The hospital she was taken too set her leg incorrectly causing a bone infection, blood infection and a coma. While in coma the doctor's injected her with Oxycodone. Upon waking from the coma she had to deal with not only the pain of her leg but also withdrawals from the pain medication. She has never recovered from this bone break. Her body can't fight off the infections anymore.
All of this has compromised her immune system. She has been in constant pain for so many years and its just not fair. I'm so torn. I want her to fight and get better but I don't know if thats fair for her. She has fought for so long and her body is tired.
I'm having a hard time deciding whether I should fly down to Georgia to see her or should I remember her the way I know her as she was healthy and not in agonizing pain where she may not remember me. I'm very torn. I don't handle things like this we'll. When think like this happen I she down. I don't show any emotion. I don't want to be comforted or know how to comfort. I don't know how to talk about it. I think this post has been a way of coping for me. I just ask for you all for your prayers or positive energy for my Aunt Susan.
My Aunt Susan was born in the mid 50's. She grew up in constant pain and in many hospitals. She wore braces on her legs as a child and was made fun of on a daily basis. My mom and their older brother would always beat people up for her. She was later diagnosed with Spina Bifida. As a teenager she spent an entire year in Blythdale Children's Hospital. As 16, my mother was married and she walked down the aisle with crutches and an entire body cast. She has always been tough as nails.
As an adult she graduated nursing school and became a neonatal nurse at one of NYC's worst hospitals. She nursed crack addicted babies back to health. She worked as a nurse for many years until her health again began failing. Her body wore out on her way to early. A several years ago she fell and suffered a broken leg at her home. The hospital she was taken too set her leg incorrectly causing a bone infection, blood infection and a coma. While in coma the doctor's injected her with Oxycodone. Upon waking from the coma she had to deal with not only the pain of her leg but also withdrawals from the pain medication. She has never recovered from this bone break. Her body can't fight off the infections anymore.
All of this has compromised her immune system. She has been in constant pain for so many years and its just not fair. I'm so torn. I want her to fight and get better but I don't know if thats fair for her. She has fought for so long and her body is tired.
I'm having a hard time deciding whether I should fly down to Georgia to see her or should I remember her the way I know her as she was healthy and not in agonizing pain where she may not remember me. I'm very torn. I don't handle things like this we'll. When think like this happen I she down. I don't show any emotion. I don't want to be comforted or know how to comfort. I don't know how to talk about it. I think this post has been a way of coping for me. I just ask for you all for your prayers or positive energy for my Aunt Susan.
Friday, January 20, 2012
My Friday Rant
So, the other day while on Facebook I saw this status updatde:
"Watching wedding shows and these people are pathetic. If you can't afford to have a wedding go to city hall, have a keg in the backyard and a 6 foot hero instead of having a cheap looking wedding. THE END."
Really, REALLY?!?! It made me so angy! What is worse is that 12 shallow people liked it! The words are from some one who is young 22 and lives a very comfortable life. I thought this comment was extremely shallow. My response was "I think a wedding needs to be special for the bride and groom no matter how much money spent. Weddings can be special and beautiful whether you spend $10,000 or $100,000. To each their own."
I think it hurts me more because I know I am planning a wedding on a small budget. I don't really care how much it costs. The day is about the man I love and celebrating that love. It is not a show or a performance to show off how much money I have. I will admit the girl who posted this does not have a significant other. I wonder if one day her opinions will change on weddings and marriage. I've learned since meeting my fiance that love is not about a wedding. A wedding is only the start of a beautiful and magical life together. I was so offended by the word pathetic! I wish comments like that didn't get to me. I hope the guests at my wedding will have a fun day and ultimately just be happy for the start of our life together and not be so focused on how much money is being spent on the day event.
Rant over...
HAPPY FRIDAY!
Enjoy the weekend. We are expecting our first storm of the winter. BOO!
"Watching wedding shows and these people are pathetic. If you can't afford to have a wedding go to city hall, have a keg in the backyard and a 6 foot hero instead of having a cheap looking wedding. THE END."
Really, REALLY?!?! It made me so angy! What is worse is that 12 shallow people liked it! The words are from some one who is young 22 and lives a very comfortable life. I thought this comment was extremely shallow. My response was "I think a wedding needs to be special for the bride and groom no matter how much money spent. Weddings can be special and beautiful whether you spend $10,000 or $100,000. To each their own."
I think it hurts me more because I know I am planning a wedding on a small budget. I don't really care how much it costs. The day is about the man I love and celebrating that love. It is not a show or a performance to show off how much money I have. I will admit the girl who posted this does not have a significant other. I wonder if one day her opinions will change on weddings and marriage. I've learned since meeting my fiance that love is not about a wedding. A wedding is only the start of a beautiful and magical life together. I was so offended by the word pathetic! I wish comments like that didn't get to me. I hope the guests at my wedding will have a fun day and ultimately just be happy for the start of our life together and not be so focused on how much money is being spent on the day event.
Rant over...
HAPPY FRIDAY!
Enjoy the weekend. We are expecting our first storm of the winter. BOO!
Thursday, January 19, 2012
8 Years...
Eight years ago yesterday I lost a friend.
It was the first time I had ever experienced death that I was old enough to understand.
It was my first time experiencing heartache.
I remember the day vividly. It was a snowy Sunday morning. Nothing had accumulated yet but something just went wrong. I still think of him every time I pass that stretch of road. After he passed I have a debilitating fear of driving in the bad weather. Every time snow is forecasted I get horrible pains in my stomach.The fear is sometimes paralyzing. I think of him often. I think of his twin sister and his family often. He had a great smile and was kind in every way.
He is missed by so many.
Eight years is far to many.
23 forever.
Rest in Peace friend
My friend Anthony was killed in a car accident while driving to work.
It was my first time experiencing heartache.
I remember the day vividly. It was a snowy Sunday morning. Nothing had accumulated yet but something just went wrong. I still think of him every time I pass that stretch of road. After he passed I have a debilitating fear of driving in the bad weather. Every time snow is forecasted I get horrible pains in my stomach.The fear is sometimes paralyzing. I think of him often. I think of his twin sister and his family often. He had a great smile and was kind in every way.
He is missed by so many.
Eight years is far to many.
23 forever.
Rest in Peace friend
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
I beg you to read this post
Please take a look at this photo. Please realize who sad this story really is. Kevin is from my hometown. You know what they say about small towns? Small towns stick together. What happened to him could happen to anyone of us who go out to a bar on a Saturday night. Although I did not know Kevin I feel the need to post and share the information pertaining to his murder. A mistaken caused 3 men to brutally beat him to death on the streets. People must have seen things yet no one has been arrested for his murder.
I urge anyone who looks at this photo to share it. Whether on FB, Twitter, Pinterest. ANYWHERE!
Thank you.
I urge anyone who looks at this photo to share it. Whether on FB, Twitter, Pinterest. ANYWHERE!
Thank you.
Oh How Pinteresting- Hair and Nails
I have a serious obsession with nail polish. I really need to get a bit more obsessed with doing my hair! I have always had shorter hair styles but I decided about 3 years ago to grow it out after many requests of my then boyfriend, now fiancé. My hair is naturally curly. Not the nice curl. Its more of a fizzy mess most of the time. Often I pull my hair back or braid it instead of spending the time in the morning curling it or blowing it out. I'm hoping for some hair inspiration from Pinterest to go along with my nail obsession.
Linking up with Michelle.
BTW has anyone seen that awesome button over on my sidebar???
I absolutely LOVE it.
I can thank Bethani
Go ahead and check her out! She was creative, super fast and so easy to work with!
Thanks again Bethani!!!
Have a great Wednesday everyone!
Linking up with Michelle.
I absolutely LOVE it.
I can thank Bethani
Go ahead and check her out! She was creative, super fast and so easy to work with!
Thanks again Bethani!!!
Have a great Wednesday everyone!
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
My Best Friend's Wedding...The Reception
Jaclyn and Michael's reception was held at Orange County Park in their Stony Ford Golf Club. It was a crisp fall day. Thank goodness. One week prior to her wedding NY was under about 17 inches of snow, in October!
For the post on their ceremony post you can check here.
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| Yummy red velvet cake. |
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| Amazing view. We got their a little earlier then most guests so Brian and I enjoyed the fantastic view. We even saw some hot air balloons land at a nearby airport. |
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| Happy Mr and Mrs D |
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| First dance- Led Zepplin "Thank You" |
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| Dancing with her pops. I love how happy her husband and mom were looking on so lovingly |
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| Hey hottie. I got to sit at the same table as this cutie. Lucky me! |
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| Can you tell I had been dancing??? |
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| Danced all night. The dj did a great job. His theme was music through the years. It was awesome. |
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| People have always confused us for sisters. |
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| We call this a Sleder Sandwich. |
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| My guy is a handsome devil! |
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| Lots of dancing fun!!! We had a great time. The food was good, drinks were great, dancing and music were fantastic. I was exhausted the next day. I had blisters on my feet for a week. I had to wear flip flops to work for days. It makes me even more excited for our wedding. I can't wait to dance the entire day away!!! Check here for details on what Brian and I wore. |
Monday, January 16, 2012
Honor...
Today is not just another day off. We must honor the man who this day is named for.
The time is always right to do what is right.
"Human progress is neither automatic nor inevitable... Every step
toward the goal of justice requires sacrifice, suffering, and struggle;
the tireless exertions and passionate concern of dedicated
individuals." - Martin Luther King, Jr
The time is always right to do what is right.
"Human progress is neither automatic nor inevitable... Every step
toward the goal of justice requires sacrifice, suffering, and struggle;
the tireless exertions and passionate concern of dedicated
individuals." - Martin Luther King, Jr
Sunday, January 15, 2012
Steppin Out Saturday-Mediterranean
I am finally getting back normal around here. My lungs are not really 100% yet but I'm getting there. I've been so tired of sitting around that I forced my body to get dressed and go out yesterday. Nothing to exciting but we had a $100 gift card to Lowes in desperate need of spending and a hideous ceiling fan in need of replacing. Seriously, I've wanted this fan before we moved in and that was almost 3 years ago. I can't wait to put it up.
I also had to treat my guy out to dinner. He was so awesome this week taking care of me. I wanted to show my appreciation for all he does. I never really take him out on dates so it was far overdue. He choose a favorite Greek place. The Mediterranean Garden Cafe is by far the best Greek food I've ever had. I had Moroccan soup and Greek salad. Brian had a Kebob and we split hummus, bag ganoush, grilled eggplant and tabouli, Outrageous food!
(Like how I'm soaking my stove top burners in the sink or the dishes drying on the counter?)
Not many places to take pictures when its cold out but I'm a fan of the blue kitchen!
Details:
Jeggings: NY&co
Coral Tank: Old Navy
Shirt and Cardigan: Aerie, on sale for $7 each!
Shoes: Charlotte Russe
I LOVE THAT STARBUCKS CUP.
Another after Christmas sale item $8
It never leaves my hands!
Love the flowers on this tank and the bows on my shoes!
Hope you all had a wonderful weekend.
Yay NY GIANTS! On our way to sunny San Fran next week.
Go Big Blue!
Thursday, January 12, 2012
It's OK Thursday
So you guys may already know I've been really sick the past few weeks and I've been on bed rest since Monday. I guess this is the bed rest addition. I can't promise any thing real exciting. Life has been filled with mindless daytime television, blogs, whining and naps.
Oh well, here goes.
It's OK-
- To change from one pair of pajamas to the next.
-To only get off the couch to heat up my coffee and refill my vaporizer.
- To have changed my nail polish 6 times in 3 days.
-To be completely obsessed with reading The Help. After watching the movie last night and just want to run out and buy the book to read asap.
- To be doing lots of online shopping with money I don't have!
- To best EXTREMELY excited for the new and last season of One Tree Hill. Did you see the intro last night?? WHAT!?!?!
- To be extremely sad that its the last season of One Tree Hill.
- To be completely obsessed with this bridal site. Its my new favorite.
-To be bummed out I haven't been to the gym in 2 weeks. This is precious wedding body/gym time!!
-To piggy back off of the above statement I've been following up each meal with a lil bit of sherbet.
- To enter every blog giveaway I've seen this week.
- To get so annoyed when people only post healthy food pictures to Facebook. It says "Look at me I'm sooooo healthy" when they are probably following their quinoa, raw egg soup with a HUGE brownie sundae topped with hot fudge.
What are you OK with this week??
Before you go please check out Alyssa's post today. Its a very real and honest post about her dad. She's looking to the blog community to join the bone marrow registry.
Be a donor! Save a life!
Oh well, here goes.
It's OK-
- To change from one pair of pajamas to the next.
-To only get off the couch to heat up my coffee and refill my vaporizer.
- To have changed my nail polish 6 times in 3 days.
-To be completely obsessed with reading The Help. After watching the movie last night and just want to run out and buy the book to read asap.
- To be doing lots of online shopping with money I don't have!
- To best EXTREMELY excited for the new and last season of One Tree Hill. Did you see the intro last night?? WHAT!?!?!
- To be extremely sad that its the last season of One Tree Hill.
- To be completely obsessed with this bridal site. Its my new favorite.
-To be bummed out I haven't been to the gym in 2 weeks. This is precious wedding body/gym time!!
-To piggy back off of the above statement I've been following up each meal with a lil bit of sherbet.
- To enter every blog giveaway I've seen this week.
- To get so annoyed when people only post healthy food pictures to Facebook. It says "Look at me I'm sooooo healthy" when they are probably following their quinoa, raw egg soup with a HUGE brownie sundae topped with hot fudge.
What are you OK with this week??
Before you go please check out Alyssa's post today. Its a very real and honest post about her dad. She's looking to the blog community to join the bone marrow registry.
Be a donor! Save a life!
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
Oh How Pinteresting- Honeymoon Fashion
I'm such a weirdo. I'm already looking towards honeymoon fashion but I haven't made any real honeymoon plans yet. I have a horrific fear of flying. I hate myself for it. Our last flight was a terrible one. Flying back from Florida 3 years ago only made my fear of flying worse. We were tossed around the plane, drinks wear thrown off trays from DC all the way up to Newark Airport. There were terrible storms up and down the east coast. We weren't able to get up at all during the flight. I had sorta panic attack in the middle of our flight. Most of the kids on the flight were crying. It was a nightmare and I don't know if I could bring myself on a plane anytime soon.
I think we are looking towards a 7 day cruise to Bermuda. Brian has been all over and I haven't really been anywhere besides Florida and England. I really wanted to go some where that he has never been. I can't get past the fact that he has traveled to all these Caribbean Islands with ex girlfriends. I highly doubt he will be thinking of his exes but I'm a bit nuts! So be it! Brian has been to Bermuda on a cruise with his family when he was a teenager and he really thinks I will love it. We shall see!
But until then here are some imaginary outfits I may have to track down before we do any traveling.
Linking up with Michelle.
Where are you going on or where have you been on your honeymoon?
I think we are looking towards a 7 day cruise to Bermuda. Brian has been all over and I haven't really been anywhere besides Florida and England. I really wanted to go some where that he has never been. I can't get past the fact that he has traveled to all these Caribbean Islands with ex girlfriends. I highly doubt he will be thinking of his exes but I'm a bit nuts! So be it! Brian has been to Bermuda on a cruise with his family when he was a teenager and he really thinks I will love it. We shall see!
But until then here are some imaginary outfits I may have to track down before we do any traveling.
Linking up with Michelle.
Where are you going on or where have you been on your honeymoon?
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