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LIFE, LOVE AND A SPLASH OF SOME GLAMOUR

Friday, June 8, 2012

On The Mend...

My body is healing and so is my heart. Yesterday the baby that was growing in my fallopian tube was removed to save my life. I arrived at the hospital very early and was prepped for the first surgery of the day. As I laid in the hospital bed waiting for the nurse it was the loneliest experience of my life. They had my mom and husband wait in the waiting room. I had the loveliest nurse who sat with me and comforted me as I cried. She reminded me I needed time to heal. My doctor reminded us what was at stake during surgery. For the first time I could see the anxiety and fear in my husbands face, absolutely heart wrenching.

As they wheeled me in to the OR all I could think of was the terrible things that could happen during surgery. They next thing I knew I was barely awake, crying and telling the nurse my belly hurt. It was all over and I could hear my doctor say everything went great and they were able to save my tube. I didn't know if I had just dreamed it so I asked my nurse and Brian later on. Brian told me once he heard the words he was immediately relieved but I still see the stress and sadness on his face. I am so glad my mom and Brian were there to comfort one another yesterday. 

Recovery went better than I expected but I guess morphine and percocets will do that to you. I tried to stay as positive as possible. Remembered all of your prayers, well wishes, messages and loving emails as I  went through recovery. I am in a lot of pain but I know the physical pain will get better. Although yesterday I felt relieved today I feel the sadness of what has truly happened. My new friend Casey emailed me a loving message saying she finds comfort knowing that our little ones are in heaven and waiting for us. I try and find comfort in that. I hope that my little one and my aunt have found one another and they are watching over us.

As I recover I will try my hardest to get back to real life. Hoping the sorrow and the pity with fade from other's faces when I tell them. I just want to smile again.

My family and I thank you all for your prayers, well wishes and positive vibes. I have looked at your comments and emails and it has filled my heart with so much comfort and love.
-K

Simply the BEST get well card from my nephew. 
He said it was a happy rainbow fish because I had a boo-boo in my belly. 

8 comments:

Alisha said...

Your nephew is the absolute sweetest. So sorry to hear about the loss of a baby like that. I can't imagine what you must be going through. Praying for you and your husband. :)

Unknown said...

So glad to hear that everything went okay with the surgery and that you are okay ... just give yourself time to heal, and lean on the people around you who love you. I'll keep sending peaceful healing vibes your way!

Unknown said...

PS - I think you need to download Jason Mraz's new album 'Love is a Four Letter Word' ... I think it'll make you feel so much better.

Kylene said...

Oh Kristina I'm just now catching up on everything that's been going on. I'm SO sorry for your loss. I'm glad to hear that everything went well with the surgery. I will keep you & Brian in my thoughts. I can't imagine the pain and sorrow you must be going through. I hope that your smile will eventually return to your face and the happiness will come back.

Lizz Judd Gray said...

Kristina, I am so very sorry. My heart is heavy for you. I'm just reading this after I saw your tweet about not wanting to go on your honeymoon. It certainly won't be the carefree vacation you had been planning, but it will be a blessing to spend that time with your husband. Sending up a prayer for you both.

Kristin said...

Praying for you girl

Sarah said...

I can't believe I missed this somehow. I am so sorry that you have been going through this...praying for you!

Monica said...

I am sorry I missed this and the previous post, , my thoughts & prayers are with you. Everything happens for a reason and the most important thing is that you are safe and healthy.

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